Originally aired: Monday October 23, 2006 on E!
Leslie [to sisters B.J. and Angel]: Okay, I've lost weight. I'm trying, okay? You know, I'm the fat one in the family. Nick is fat too. Do you know what it's like to be fat? No, you don't.
Leslie [crying to her boyfriend Mike about her sister's treatment of her]: All they do, instead of encouraging, they pick out every little thing that's wrong with me.
Leslie: I don't want to be here with all these a** holes!
Mike [Leslie's boyfriend]: They're not a** holes. They're your family.
Nick: That wasn't cool. You shouldn't have kicked her purse.
Leslie: It's better than kicking her face.
Angel [to Leslie]: I'll slit your throat! A knife is way better than a spoon, bitch!
Angel [about Leslie]: [BLEEP] psychotic bitch!
Leslie: I don't want you to treat me like a dog! I am not someone you pat on the head!
Angel: I was looking at your black roots, Leslie!
Leslie: I don't care! I like my black roots!
Leslie: I don't want to be a sister.
B.J.: Okay, then don't be. Then don't be. Why don't you have a sex change and just become a brother?
Leslie: I hate families! Families suck!
B.J.: [to Leslie]: Just remember that payback's a bitch, but revenge is Hell, and what comes around goes around.
B.J. [to Leslie]: Hit me! I'd like to see you hit me, I really would.
Leslie: Let go! I'm not going to hit her. B.J., you're the one with the warrant.
B.J.: Leslie, you're never wrong. You're God's gift to the Carters.
Leslie: And you're never sober.
Leslie: Here's the thing, Angel. My family's [BLEEP]. You guys are [BLEEP].
Angel: How are we so [BLEEP]?
Leslie: Because Angel, you guys are [BLEEP] up!
B.J. [to Leslie]: You think your [BLEEP] don't stink. Well let me tell you what. It does. It has a stench that lingers.
Nick: Then why do you say we hate you all the time? Why do you say, "I [BLEEP] hate this family"?
Leslie: Maybe you should take it as a hint.
Nick [explaining to Leslie his reasons for reuniting his family]: I'm here because there actually is something really good exists. And I'm going to do everything possible to- to get it back.
Nick: You're playing The Cat Club. Of all places, I feel like, you know, it's meant to be.
Leslie: I am a cat.
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